Quantum Raiders Forum

[Mr. Happy Pants McPantsface]

NOT SILENCE ME.

IT has been a long and undeserving while since I was last banned from this forum, like a pair of old pants cast aside by its user for a more comfortable skirt, much to the dismay of his wife of seven years and his children who have to hear the explanation from their soon to be overpaid therapist about why Daddy ran off with the hairless Philippino gardener whose name they couldn't even pronounce.

By the way, the gardener in this story is a man. See, I'm implying that people who throw away pants are homosexuals, who, are incidentally, who I am here today to talk to you all about. So without further ado, homosexuals.

HOMOSEXUALS, or as they preferred to be called, AIDS vectors, are just like you and I, except they engage in anal sex more frequently and often own clothing made of leather in various, exotic colors, rather than a natural brown or gas station bathroom black. Incidentally, most wearing the latter are also homosexuals. But I digress.

So once the matchsticks have been left in the sun for four hours and the sulfur on the tips is sufficiently dried, then you have successfully made your own homemade matches! Congratulations! Go out, celebrate with the family. Hug your old man, he'll be proud. You finally did something with your life! Hug your kids! Hell, hug someone else's kids. Go wild, go crazy. After all, that cough is actually the result of years of exposure to asbestos in school from licking the paint on the walls, and you'll be dead in three months from those tumors the doctors never thought to look for. All because of HOMOSEXUALS.

Need I say any more? I think not. I've found religion, and have attained the status of reverend through minutes of hard thinking and a five-dollar commitment purchase. Which makes me better than you. Because I can marry (and I'm assuming divorce) people. I can't legally perform a Briss yet. But I've done it anyway. Man, those suckers can bleed.

Peace be with you (except for the gays)
-Rev. Happypants McPantsface

[Hagios]

Good to see some normalcy rejoin the community.

Will you be joining us on Qrro perchance?

[Rizzy886]

Fuck yeah, Seaking.